I've been unhappy most of my life. I didn't have a goal until late adolescence. I struggle. A lot. My development as a human being was non-existent because I could not find a single reason to make an effort. Taking small steps every day to move forward is something I implemented in my mid-20s - and even then I had my doubts that it would change anything.
Now I'm really grateful to my past self that he didn't stop moving forward. Looking back, I'm beginning to understand how my hard work has opened so many doors that I thought would remain closed forever. I'm still learning something new about myself every day. It helps me to appreciate myself more, because the impostor syndrome has been with me throughout this journey called life. Taking the time to sit down and understand my behaviour allowed me to find my strengths and weaknesses. Eventually I started to value my time and got rid of the lion's share of distractions.
I look around and see a society full of people living in a digital prison. Of course, I'm still one of them - it's really hard to give up the addiction to instant gratification. But there are more and more days when I don't lurk on my favourite websites at all. It's something I'm proud of, given that a few years ago I could close the desktop version of Reddit, only to unconsciously open it on my phone a moment later. Addiction is a bitch. If I have to work so hard to kick my bad habits, I'm pretty sure some psychiatrist is going to get filthy rich in the future, thanks to kids who breathe digital air from birth.
Anyway, I think it's less and less of a problem for me. Personal growth is something I am focusing on exclusively at the moment. Coding, designing, writing, making music - you name it. Apart from that, I have spent a lot of time just improving my mind and body. I can't imagine my life without daily meditation. My bike rides in the woods are irreplaceable. I never miss a day of training. My week feels empty without a basketball or football game with my friends. My routine has changed from something I have to do to something I want to do. I'm still not where I want to be as there are still a few aspects I need to work on - but overall I feel fulfilled and accomplished. Doing something creative gives me a lot more pleasure than some meme that will be irrelevant in a few years. It definitely helps to overcome distractions.
In summary, I just want to say that I'm grateful. I'm grateful for a lot of things, but today I'm just grateful to be me. I've been through a lot and I'm really proud of who I've become. I've put so much work into myself and I can't wait to see how I develop as a person in the near future. I hope to read this article one day with a smile on my face. And I'll have only one thing to say - "You'll never guess, kiddo".
Quick fun fact - I'm a very organised person and everything needs to be on my todo list a week in advance, but when I write something I do it spontaneously. From the heart, I would say. I love writing and I love seeing my craft improve with each new article. Have a nice day, dear reader!